In this series, Blades of Funny scours the internet and finds memorable comments left under hockey-related stories. You may laugh, you may cry, you may block this site on your browser so you never have to read this drivel again, but one thing is certain: you will not become any smarter by reading this post.

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The Article: Deadspin shares this story by the National Post which examines the unlikely trend of hockey jerseys being popular among youth in Africa. A snippet from the Post’s article:

The phrase “Dead White Man Clothes” is a common term in Uganda’s marketplace. In Ghana, (where I spotted a Winnipeg Jets jersey in 2005) the phrase in local Twi is “obruni we wo.” Translation: “a white man has died.”

After all, why else would anyone give up these perfectly good clothes?

The Comment by Hit Bull Win Streak:

“Dead White Man’s Clothes”

And here I thought I was the only one still rocking the John Kordic Nordiques jersey

BoF: Well played.

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The Article: Down Goes Brown gets Flyers fans worked up with his post on Carcillo ( which includes a joke about Carcillo’s mustache), leading a Flyers fan to reply in anger:

You’re 30 and can’t grow facial hair ( it’s a throw back stache to honor the bullies) dumb ass

Which sets up…

The Comment by bleedblueandwhite:

Carcillo growing the ‘stache to honor the bullies is like playing Nickleback at a Rolling Stones tribute. if you’re gonna honor someone, don’t suck at it

BoF: A comment that slams both Carcillo and Nickelback? That deserves enshrinement into the internet hall of fame, my friends.

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The Article: Taking a look at how Crosby is being received in Montreal: A restaurant on St-Denis Street laid out a white No. 87 Crosby jersey over a red carpet on the sidewalk, so that patrons could stomp on it.

The Comment by John David:

His Jersey should be stomped on.

What has Crosby done for Canada?

He went to the USA because they were the highest bidder and offered him the biggest pot of money.

He is a disgrace to Canada…why isn’t he playing for Montreal? Because MONEY got in the way and he was offered a bigger cheque in the USA.

BoF: This guy NEEDS to be featured on HNIC’s iDesk like RIGHT NOW. I can’t even imagine what Cherry’s reaction would be, but I bet it would be epic. Then again, Cherry may very well side with this theory, which…wouldn’t be as epic.

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The Article: Grey whale makes rare appearance in Vancouver’s False Creek

The Comment by anonymous (here):

Breaking News:

Unconfirmed reports that the whale swimming around in False Creek today was actually Dustin Byfuglien.

BoF: Zing!

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The Article: Both MSNBC and NBC Chicago got suckered in by an obviously fake story about members of the Canucks being fined for planning a pizzeria crawl of Chicago’s deep dish establishments, and reported it as fact.

The Comment by Steve U:

3 Dead, 13 Injured as Mafia War Intensifies – Crime, B7

Record Pumpkin Crop Reported in Farmville, KS – U.S., C4

BoF: Well played.

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The Article: Cult of Hockey shares an excerpt from a Blades of Funny post.

The Comment by bill:

not really amusing. not that im not game for ripping on souray

BoF: Can’t really argue with the ‘not really amusing’ part, but has Bill ever wondered how his comments affect other people? Some people may have feelings which are even more sensitive than Sheldon Souray’s and reading stuff like this really cuts right to the soul…sniff…I think next time…sniff sniff…Bill should think twice before leaving…sniff…his malicious comments…sniff sniff…It’s Edmontonians like him…sniff…that give the city a bad reputation…sniff…

In this series, Blades of Funny scours the internet and finds memorable comments left under hockey-related stories. You may laugh, you may cry, you may block this site on your browser so you never have to read this drivel again, but one thing is certain: you will not become any smarter by reading this post.

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The Article: The Vancouver Canucks are playing one of those so-called “meaningless” games on Saturday, wrapping up the NHL regular season with a home contest against the Calgary Flames.

The Comment by Sheriff Woody: Ask the Leafs for some pointers…82 meaningless games this year….

BoF: ZING!

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The Article: Ladies and gentleman, let’s hear it for country-western recording artist Theoren Fleury. For the past few months, the former NHL star has been honing his vocal chords at Calgary-based studio Pyramid Productions.

The Comment by edhull: Is he drunk?

BoF: Nope, just broke.

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The Article: Six players from Slovenia’s league champion, Acroni Jesenice, have been booted from the team after beating up their head coach in drunken post-game celebration. The six then turned on the coach, reportedly beating him with wooden traffic signs that they found by the side of the road.

The Comment by President Camacho: The coach tried yelling “Stop!”, but the team just assumed he wanted them to beat him with a specific sign.

BoF: ZING!

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The Article: Iginla has made it clear he wants to be part of the solution. But public debate still rages over whether Thursday’s tilt was the final act at home for the face of the franchise.

The Comment by Anonymous: Iggy goes I go. and I am a hard core flames fan. dont let it come down to that

BoF: Darryl, is that you? Yeah, I bet it’s you.

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The Article: TWO WEEKS AGO, they [Flyers] were the team everybody wanted to play in the playoffs. The feeling is slightly different now. They have won two games in a row entering their critical final weekend, with two games against the Rangers, and have played a more inspired brand of hockey over their last five. “Now if we play this way,” Danny Briere was saying after practice yesterday, “I don’t think a lot of teams want to play us. We’ve said it all along. We’re built as a playoff team. We’re warriors.”

The Comment by noslok: Ha ha ha! “I don’t think a lot of teams want to play us.”? Are you kidding? Well, here’s an engraved invitation from Washington: Please, oh please, can we PLEASE play the Flyers in the first round? ROTFL!!!

BoF: You hear that, Briere? It’s not just an invitation, but an ENGRAVED invitation. Those take time and effort to create.

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The Article: Sami Salo showed up Friday for the Vancouver Canucks team photo, and left on the injury list. It sounds like a cruel joke. Instead, it’s a cruel reality for the Canucks.

The Comment by anonymous: The Vancouver Canucks are like a disappointing wife that keeps on forgetting your birthday every year!

BoF: //double take… What? I’m thinking this poor guy needs to sit his wife down and talk it out, instead of getting his feelings out by leaving random metaphors on the internet.

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The Article: A list of the 2009-10 Masterton nominees

The Comment by Jasper the Black Lab: What does Chris Drury persevere through? Can’t he hire a lackey to carry his obscenely large paycheques?

BoF: Nope, the lackey is currently on an exclusive contract working for Wade Redden.

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This concludes the festivities for this post. Please take the time to follow Blades of Funny on twitter. If you do not, then the next time you hail a cab, Patrick Kane will rush up and ask if you want to split the fare with him. It’s your call, my friend.