Since the season ended, Blades of Funny has had insiders who were inside (thus the name) meetings involving each team’s management. Here are some choice quotes we overheard general managers saying…

Anaheim Ducks: “Hey, if we can’t sign Bobby Ryan, let’s just stick a #9 jersey on Matt Beleskey and tell people that Bobby had to change his name again.” – Bob Murray

Yes, Rick "Natural Man" Dudley does have a record.

Atlanta Thrashers: “You see those pictures behind me. The subjects in those photos are Stan Bowman and his secretary, Jessica. These photos, gentlemen, hold the key to our off-season.” – Rick Dudley

Boston Bruins: “Let me call Burkie and work some of my magic on him to see what he’ll give us in return for a hockey player who can’t count to 10 without focusing to the extreme.” – Peter Chiarelli

Buffalo Sabres: “It’s that time of the year, again. Let’s do what we always do, which is… nothing.” – Darcy Regier

Calgary Flames: “Hey, did you guys see how Lamoriello brought Arnott back to Jersey? I like that. In fact, I like that so much that I’m going to one-up him.” – Darryl Sutter

Carolina Hurricanes: “Rod Brind’Amour retired. Meeting adjourned. Enjoy your summer, guys.” – Jim Rutherford

Chicago Blackhawks: “F*ck! F*ck! F*ck! Motherf*ck!” – Stan Bowman

Colorado Avalanche: “Okay guys, last year we drafted Duchene and O’Reilly. They turned out well. In fact, they turned out so well that we’ll have to spend big bucks to retain them, so let’s tone things down this year. Let’s see … probable 2nd rounders … 3rd rounders … I got it! Joey Hishon! He’s our guy!” – Greg Sherman

Columbus Blue Jackets: “I forgot how good the food is at the draft. The last few years Hitch always ate everything before we even got there.  However, instead of eating, we probably should have paid closer attention to the prospects. Turns out Ryan Johansen isn’t a defenseman.” – Scott Howson

Dallas Stars: “Will somebody please go outside and tell Modano that the season is over and he can go home. He’s been hanging outside my office since spring. Awwwwkwwwward!” – Joe Nieuwendyk

Detroit Red Wings: “Will somebody please go outside and tell Modano that we’re not interested. He’s been hanging outside my office since Nieuwendyk kicked him out of Dallas.” – Ken Holland

Edmonton Oilers: “You guys are doing a fantastic job. Our youth movement is drawing comparisons to the Oilers of the 80′s. Now all we need is a Gretzky, a Messier, a Coffey and a Fuhr.” – Steve Tambellini

Florida Panthers: “As you can see by what’s happening in Chicago, I build my teams to self-destruct after I leave. Let this be a warning to those of you that want to play petty office politics with me.” – Dale Tallon

Los Angeles Kings: “F*cking Russians. From Frolov to Kovalchuk, they can all go to hell.” – Dean Lombardi

Modano: "I'll even play baseball. Just sign me!"

Minnesota Wild: “Hey, is that Mike Modano outside my office?” – Chuck Fletcher

Montreal Canadiens: “The future of the Montreal Canadiens now rests on Carey Price’s shoulders. … Hey, guys? … Hey? … What are you all doing? … Are those resumes you’re all faxing? ” – Pierre Gauthier

Nashville Predators: “Gentlemen, I bring great news! Hockey is FINALLY catching on in Nashville! I just came back from the coffee shop where I overheard two women having a conversation that involved the word ‘hockey’. Something about Carrie Underwood is marrying a HOCKEY player. This is a breakthrough! A BREAKTHROUGH!” – David Poile

New Jersey Devils: “Grrr.” – Lou Lamoriello

New York Islanders: “You guys won’t believe the story I planted in the media today. Check out this Darren Dreger tweet. ROFLMAO!” – Garth Snow

New York Rangers: “I don’t care how much it costs, get me a f*ckin’ enforcer with a cool nickname. That’s what I want this summer! Waaaaaaa! Waaaaaaa!” – Glen Sather

Ottawa Senators: “Sh*t! It says here that contract offers do NOT have to be sent out at exactly noon on July 1st. We DID have time to proofread.” – Bryan Murray

Philadelphia Flyers: “Okay, I acquired Nabokov for a few days. All those ‘Holmgren needs to get a real goalie’  people can now shut the f*ck up.” – Paul Holmgren

Phoenix Coyotes: “Just got off the phone with Gary. He told me that any signing over $1,000,000 is coming out of our personal pockets.” – Don Maloney

Pittsburgh Penguins: “Crosby looked pissed after our season ended. We better do something or he’ll have us killed.” – Ray Shero

San Jose Sharks: “First things first: which one of you bastards googled ‘doug wilson’s hot daughter‘ on the office computer?” – Doug Wilson

St. Louis Blues: “OH CRAP! Have any of you looked at Halak’s stats? He’s only had one good year… and he only played like 40 games… like, what the hell, man? I thought he was like Dryden and Roy combined.” – Doug Armstrong

Tampa Bay Lightning: “So it’s finalized: 15 minutes prior to each press conference, I will stand at the podium and the media will be let in and proceed to tell me how much they want to suck my di*k. After which, I will sign autographs for each of them. Gosh, maybe if I was named LeBron, I’d enjoy all this ego stroking.” – Steve Yzerman

Toronto Maple Leafs: “You guys handle the off-season stuff for me this year. I have a parade outfit to pick out.” – Brian Burke

Vancouver Canucks: “Soooo… this is a little awkward… when Naslund was my client, I sort of, um, lost a bet to him…  and so if I ever became a GM, I would have to, um, retire his…” – Mike Gillis

Washington Capitals: “We have a good team, right? No, we have a GREAT team, right? We don’t need to do anything, right?  … Varlamov and Neuvirth will do just fine, right? … Alex? … Alex? … Alex, you still there, Alex?” – George McPhee

As always, follow BoF on Twitter for more fun.

(A weekly feature on Blades of Funny where I share a few must-read articles from the hockey world, and then add in a lame joke. While it’s technically supposed to be posted on Friday, you never know with this thing because it has a mind of its own. Read something good? Send it in! Wrote something funny? Send it in! Want to tell me how much you hate me? I’d love to hear it!)

I haven’t done one of these in weeks and I’m making some huge changes with this series. Taking it in a whole different direction. Okay, really, just one change:  I dropped the “Friday” part from the title of the series because it didn’t make any sense when posted on another day. Branding be damned! If I had any long-time readers, it would be difficult for them to adjust to the new format. Thank goodness I don’t.

No hate mail, please. Thanks.

National Post – Bruce Arthur wrote a great piece on Brian Burke marching in a Pride Parade and, thereby, keeping a promise he made to his late son.

For all of the laughs and chuckles I have at Brian’s expense, I’ve always been impressed by the principles he lives by; even if many are crazy egotistical.

The world could use more men like him. I’m sure Bruins fans agree.

Oh man, make it stop! That’s what Brian said!

Okay, I’m going to hell. Just like Brian will according to the Christians!

I can’t stop, guys. Brian just can’t stop lovin’ them.

ENOUGH!

Hockey Independent -  Justin M. makes a pro-Kovalchuk case with regards to the Isles. I don’t agree with some of what’s said, but it’s a well-written and thought-out piece which gives the other side of my stance on this issue.

One thing I strongly disagree with is made in point #4:

With future extensions for Okposo, Tavares, Bailey, and the other prospects coming up, we obviously want to be very careful, however, we have enough room to sign them all to $7 million a year contracts and still have some cap space, that’s how well Snow has done financially. Furthermore, Yashin’s contract buyout dips down from a $4 million cap hit to only $2 million cap hit after this year, freeing up another $2 million. Also, we must remember that the salary cap increases anywhere from $1-2 million per year, freeing up even more space for the Islanders. If people are complaining that we are going to become Chicago Blackhawks 2.0, I think they better look again. The Islanders have kept players at such reasonable values that bringing in a player like Kovalchuk will not affect us financially, whatsoever! Bring on any “cap-ologist” and he will tell you the exact same thing

The Islanders “kept players at such reasonable values” because Snow’s roster is filled with entry-level guys and misfits that fill out the depth chart + Mark Streit and goaltending. It’s easy to stay economical when that’s the case. Most fans think short-term and are quick to cast aside cap issues for another day, but that free space can fill up quick when your players come off entry-level contracts and you start bringing in guys to upgrade your depth. Also, if the NHL’s cap number increases, so will future contracts.

I’m not against signing him at $10m, but it has to be for 5-6 years max. We’ve seen it time and time again with players that hit their mid 30′s and can no longer produce like they once could. How is it going to feel in 2016 when a 33-year-old Kovy is barely able to get 30 goals/60 points and still has 4 years left at that ticket? That’s not an unrealistic scenario.

Intent To Blow -  ITB has been coming out with some hilarious stuff, like this piece that ties Ilya to the Russian spies arrested by the FBI. When you visualize what’s written, it’s laugh-out-loud stuff. Clink.

Hockey or Die – Jonathan Willis takes Mike Brophy to task. I’m not saying that if my 93-year-old grandma wrote a hockey column, she’d bring more to the table than Brophy, but yeah, she would. And she has never seen a game.

"How could my brother do this to me?"

Flames Insider – Looks like Daymond Langkow’s season (and possibly his career) might be in trouble due to his crappy play his neck injury. This could turn out to be a break  for Sutter in not only the salary cap department (clearing room to sign Ian White without needing to make any more moves) but also the Jokinen PR department (since Olli was arguably the 2nd best UFA center available behind Lombardi). So the Jokinen signing gets upgraded from “OH MY GOD!!! WHY THE F*UCK DID HE DO THAT?!” to a “OH MY GOD!!! Why the f*ck did he do that?”

Flames Nation – I always enjoy reading Kent Wilson’s opinions on the Flames and in this one, he shares his views on their recent signings. If you’re wondering what he thinks of Olli’s puck-handling, wonder no more…

He handles the puck like a man stickhandles a brick with a fishing rod.

Puck Update -  Steven Ovadia takes a stab at figuring out what Sutter was thinking on July 1st. I know we’re getting a little too much Flames stuff in the links today but how could I not link to an article that includes the following line:

I think at this point in his career with the Flames, Iginla is just happy when the correct number of players show up for a game.

Don’t Trade Vinny – How Yzerman was able to unload Meszaros’ contract. Very funny.

Speaking of which, if you read my post on Saturday, I asked for some feedback on Meszaros because he was being portrayed by the media as the exact opposite of how I’ve always thought of him. DTV and Kevin from Stay Classy shared their thoughts in the comment section of that post. I love being right.

Down Goes Brown – DGB takes a look at some notable signings from recent years. A snippet:

Jason Blake, Toronto, 2007 – The Leafs agree to terms with Blake early in the day, although the actual contract signing is delayed several hours due to technical problems after it’s discovered that John Ferguson Jr. had earlier tried to fax himself a grilled cheese sandwich.

Sports Pickle – The 8 “athletes” you’ll see at the beach this summer. Not a hockey link but hilarious and fitting:

2. The Long-Distance Swimmer

In the water there is a generally agreed upon distance from the shore — about 50 yards or so — that no one goes beyond. And if you do, the lifeguard whistles you back closer to shore. But the Long-Distance Swimmer guy can’t hear the whistle because his head is in the water and he’s flailing away, apparently training to be the first man to swim across the Atlantic. Nor does he care, because he is Long-Distance Swimmer guy. No teenage lifeguard is going to stand in his way of immortality. No, the teenage lifeguard will only delay his mortality when he swims out to save Long-Distance Swimmer guy, who started to get tired and is now panicking and flailing around upon seeing he’s way way WAY too far out from shore.

Well, that’s that! Don’t forget to follow along on Twitter. To further market my Twitter stream, I plan to share with my followers candid bikini photos of my wife at the beach (just kidding, hun … *snap* *click* … oh yeah!).

Lots to talk about today so I’ll dive right in:

What's this guy all about?

–Let’s talk about Andrej Meszaros. If you’ve seen him play day in and day out, can you please explain to me what type of player he is?

I keep reading that he is a physical shutdown defenseman. I am baffled by this. From what I’ve know about him, while he does block shots, he’s nowhere near being a shutdown guy. And as far as him being physical? I find that wrong, too.

He always struck me as more of an offensive defensive who sh*t the bed when he went to Tampa. Kind makes me want to compare him to a Keith Ballard-type, who is a good #3 or #4 dman but sucks as a #1. Am I right, or way off? Somebody with info please explain… DTV (Bots)? … Kevin (Sens)? … Anybody?

I’m just baffled that the media guys are calling him a physical shutdown guy.

–Speaking of the Flyers, I had a pretty good conversation going on Twitter with regards to Gagne and Carter.

News broke yesterday that Holmgren has asked Gagne to waive his NTC and I thought this would please Flyers fans since trading Simon means that Carter stays.

Flyers fans were quick and passionate to say that is not the case. Gagne is a heart and soul guy in Philly, while Carter is seen as a lazy bastard. Good post here by Broad Street Hockey that explains this better than I can.

This surprised me because  I’d take, without hesitation, Carter over Gagne  if I were going forward. Holmgren must be feel the same way since Gagne is the guy headed out.

"Yay! I'm not injured today!"

–This leads me to ask: where is Gagne going and for what? If it’s a salary dump to sign a #1 goaltender, then I’m baffled as to why they would give $1.5m to Leighton. I’m also baffled why they would pay Jody freakin’ Shelley $1.1m and take on Meszaros’ contract.

You’ve got to think the Flyers would have been better off with Gagne and some $2m defenseman like Andy Sutton filling out the #5 D spot rather than grabbing Meszaros’ contract and thus handcuffing themselves with Gagne, Carter, Leino, and Giroux all up next summer.

Philly’s moves so far are baffling to me. I think I’ve used that word too much already!

–Remember my UFA prediction post? I nailed 2 destinations out of the 13 which have signed already (Kubina and Hamhuis). I also nailed Jokinen, which was done as a joke but I’m still counting it. So 3 out of 13. Just like my test scores in grade school!

–Of course, Kovalchuk hasn’t committed yet. Big news broke last night that the Islanders are making a push and offering a 10 year contract at $10m a season.

Let me address the 10 year at $10m contract with one word: INSANE!

I like Kovalchuk and I’m not a hater of his game, but unless you’re signing a 21-year-old Ovechkin, Crosby or, maybe, Malkin, you’re nuts if you are offering this contract out.

The most popular  justifications for it are: 1)  they need to hit the cap floor, so why not him?;  2) attracting a free agent to the Isles is hard.

The second one is easy to answer. If they win, they’ll have no problems attracting talent. But he’ll help them win, you say? Well, at $10m they won’t have any money to attract any free agents!

The first one (cap floor) may be an issue this year but it certainly won’t be an issue in the future. Just think when Tavares, Bailey, Okposo, Niederreiter and others players who develop (like de Haan or their top 5 pick next year *cheeky grin*) have to re-up. At that time, a $10m Kovalchuk contract will be crippling.

If it’s a 5 or 6 year contract that takes Ilya up to age 32/33, then I have no issue with it. It’s the final 4 years of a 10 year contract where I say you have to pass on at that price. Especially if you’re trying to build the team via the draft and develop (and retain) your own players.

"In Soviet Russia, I'm going to be SUPER RICH!"

If people argue that the Luongo and Hossa contracts may have been mistakes at cap hits in the low $5m, then I can’t see how anyone could think a $10m cap hit for 10 years for basically a sniper (a damn good one, but that’s the only thing he brings to the table) is a good move.

Sometimes the best deal is one that doesn’t happen (see: Gillis offering Mats Sundin $20m over 2 years) and a GM is better off doing nothing than doing something that handcuffs the team (see: Dale Tallon signing Huet and Campbell).

Cliff-note version of my opinion on Kovy: 5/6 years at $10m per = justified, 10 years at $10m per = dumb.

–You know what I’m thinking now? Paul Martin at $5m per season for 5 years is kinda crazy. I think we were all bamboozled by the UFA hype here. Myself included, but I’m catching myself right now and saying that his contract may turn out to have been ill-advised. We’ll see.

–I’m starting to warm up to the Ballard trade that Gillis pulled off when it’s coupled with the Hamhuis signing. But getting back to Meszaros (and if he’s really as good as Holmgren and the media are making him out to be), how does he go for only a 2nd round pick when Ballard went for a 1st rounder and a pretty decent prospect in Grabner (I’m not including Bernier in the conversation because he sucks).

I’d rather have Ballard over Meszaros but it seems like Gillis overpaid.

–Another point about the Canucks: I heard that Cody Hodgson is not on the list to attend their prospect camp. That strikes me as being strange. He should be there even if it’s just as a PR thing after the perceived tension between the organization and player this past season.

(BoF edit: fyi, Trevor (his blog) left a comment saying there’s nothing controversial here: “It’s pretty typical of how the Canucks usually manage their prospect camps…2 or 3 and then you graduate to the main training camp.”)

–And yet another Canucks note: With Bieksa being in play, the Columbus Blue Jackets are rumored to be interested in him and putting Filatov in play. I can’t imagine it would be a straight-up type of trade but if it is, Gillis should take a private plane to Ohio and seal that deal.

Bieksa is a dumb hockey player who makes dumb decisions. He has the ability to put up 40 points but he’s not worth the headache, in my opinion. At 29, there’s no upside there. He is what he is: inconsistent and nothing more than a 4th defenseman on the depth chart.

–Last but not least. I’m sad to report that my Argentinean soccer team lost today to Germany. Having made a bet with BoF reader Rouven, I now have to support Germany in their efforts for the Golden Trophy. So……

GO GERMANY!

*cringe*

Well, since I’m forced to support them, I might as well find a reason why.

Behold the reason…

That’s nice and all, but really does not compare to where my loyalty lies…

Woo hoo! Finally Argentina defeats Germany at something today!

This post is going to part serious and part humor. The serious part consists of me seriously trying to predict where the top unrestricted free agents will land. The humor part will come on July 1st when all my picks are wrong. Sounds like fun, no?  Let’s go! (Please keep in mind that I’m just talking out of my butt.)

Kovalchuk: he's the top dawg... and he knows it!

Ilya Kovalchuk: Los Angeles Kings at a $9m cap hit.
The Kings will be up against the cap after this signing which may cause them some headaches in the coming years. But for now: enjoy the ride!

Anton Volchenkov: Anaheim Ducks at $6m.
I’m crazy you say? Well, of course. But with Scotty retired, the Ducks need to make a splash and have the cap room to outbid other teams for the hulking Russian. Overpaid? You bet! Especially when there’s…

Zbynek Michalek: Washington Capitals at $3.5m.
Michalek presents the best blueline value, in my opinion. He’s solid in his own zone and will come cheaper than Volchenkov which will allow the Caps to go after a decent 1A goalie as well.

Dan Hamhuis: Vancouver Canucks at $4.75m.
This signing pretty much paves the way for the departure of Kevin Bieksa. Whichever team  dumb enough to trade for Bieksa will be rewarded with a player who makes dumb plays all the time. A match made in heaven, if you will.

Sergei Gonchar: Dallas Stars at $4.5m.
He’ll get his money but with his age and recent injury history, I wouldn’t touch him.

Evgeni Nabokov: Philadelphia Flyers at $5m OR KHL at $15m and 100 gallons of oil.
Whooooa!!! I just went out on a massive limb. I feel like an anonymous hockey blogger! Nah, he’ll most likely sign in the NHL but I have no clue as to what team he makes the most sense with. Especially at a $5m cap hit.

Chris Mason: Washington Capitals at $3.5m.
If it comes down to Mason or Turco., I’d be shocked if any GM would actually prefer the latter. If this happens, it’s a good signing. So make it happen!

(BoF edit: According to a reader comment, this is unlikely. But hey, maybe the Caps will use the money to target Lombardi who I also goofed up on in this post. See below.)

(BoF edit #2: I’m changing Mason’s team to Tampa. However, if he signs in Washington, I’m sticking with my original thought. Win-win!  Unless he signs with any of the other 28 teams, in which case I’ll continue looking like an idiot.)

Paul Martin: New Jersey Devils at $4.5m.
I think both parties will come around and keep Martin in Jersey. If not, maybe the Devils will sign Gonchar instead and regret it later.

Matthew Lombardi: Pittsburgh Penguins at $3.5m.
And the endless Crosby winger-matching continues. This one may work out well (or maybe not).

(BoF edit: I’m pretty retarded. Lombardi is a center but for some reason this morning I was convinced he played the wing in Calgary prior to going to Phoenix. So yeah, scratch this one off the list ’cause the Pens need another center like I need more arguments with the wife!!!)

Russia: Verrrrry Nice!

Alexander Frolov: KHL.
Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, will pay him the $5 million I read that his agent is seeking in North America. If the price of oil falls, he may even have a hard time getting that in Russia (nah, that’s a lie because the extortion cash will always be there).

Willie Mitchell: Pittsburgh Penguins at $3m.
This can work out great if he’s healthy, or be a disaster if he’s not. Either way, it’s the least the Penguins can do to apologize after Malkin knocked him out.

Marty Turco: Philadelphia Flyers or San Jose Sharks at $2.5m.
If the Nabokov thing doesn’t work out, I’m thinking the Flyers take a flyer (haha) on Turco. He’ll come cheap because, well, he’s been having a rough time since the trapezoid was implemented. Those little lines cost him millions. Or maybe it was his realivitly sh*ty play that cost him (who knows with these things).

Olli Jokinen: Calgary Flames at $5m. JUST KIDDING! GodKnowsWhere at $3m.
I have a hard time finding a fit for him. However, you can be assured that wherever he goes, he’ll manage to royally screw things up. He’s the Milbury of hockey players these days. Maybe, just maybe, he may turn out well in the right spot. It’s happened before.

Pavel Kubina: Tampa Bay Lightning at $3.5m.
I can see him going to a few different teams but chose Tampa because I feel they really need another 3-4 defenseman-type. This should be a good fit for him, in my opinion.

Tom Lydman: New York Islanders at $3.5m.
Another defenseman that can fit on a number of teams who are looking to add depth to their blueline. He’ll be a decent 3-4 blueliner and the Isles are a good fit.

Henrik Tallinder: Buffalo Sabres at $3.5m.
And yet another defenseman who can fill out the depth chart as a 3-4 guy. He was Lydman’s partner in Buffalo and I’m thinking they keep at least one of them. My thinking is always wrong, though, so there you go.

Joe Corvo: Columbus Blue Jackets $2.5m.
He should help out with the Jackets powerplay. Maybe he’ll get $3m. Maybe. But probably not.

Colby Armstrong: Pittsburgh Penguins at $2.0m.
Colby makes his triumphant return to Pittsburgh! Nah, probably won’t happen because he’ll go after the money and should get around $3m somewhere else. Stay tuned, Sid may start tearing up if Colby doesn’t come back.

Ray Whitney, Alex Tanguay, Alexei Ponikarovsky, Lee Stempinak.
All three should get somewhere between $2m to $3m. Whitney may get a tad more if  he signs a one year contract. Too hard to predict where they end up because it could be anywhere. Even Russia. And I don’t have my KHL roster reports handy.

Paul Kariya's Ride

Pavol Demitra, Paul Kariya.
Whichever team signs them better invest in a new CT Scan machine and some extra doctors. Whichever GM signs either one for more than $1.5m better stick his brain into said CT Scan machine.

This concludes my look into the UFA class. There are others but they all suck! (with all due apologizes to Antero Niittymaki).

Oh, and one last thing before I go. Even the worst hockey player that signs a contract on Thursday will make more money than you or I. Soooooo, the only thing we have left is laughter. The more we make fun of hockey players, the more we’re able to hide our inadequacies. Man Rule #425.

Now that I’ve put myself out there, it’s time for you to mock me to no end on Twitter. You can do so by following me here.

I know I have not been posting many any humor posts lately but bear with me. I never want to force those things so for now you’ll be getting a big dose of these “Serious Thoughts” pieces.

"I'd rather be in Montreal"

–Being a hockey geek, I did know who Lars Eller was prior to yesterday. Still, my initial reaction to the Halak trade was: “that’s it?” But the more I thought about it, the more I laughed the traded started to grow on me.

There is a surplus of middle-of-the-pack goaltending in the league right now and as good as Halak was for a stretch in the playoffs, he’s far from anything other than a middle-of-the-pack goalie right now. Besides saving $2-$3m in cap space by going with Price, getting a 1st rounder who is ready to step in next season isn’t a bad trade-off.

Only time can show us the true colors of this trade. For instance, if Eller turns out to be a first-liner and Carey plays up to his potential, then Habs fans will no longer want to lynch Gauthier (even if Halak wins a Vezina). The latter is a big “if” though. However…

From Dryden to this...

–Everyone (myself included) makes fun of Carey Price, and if you didn’t know better, judging by the jokes you’d think he’s the equivalent of Toskala. That’s far from the truth. He’s only 22 and when he matures, he’ll do fine, in my opinion. Let’s also take into account the added confidence he should get from not having to look over his shoulder all the time. I would have chosen Price over Halak too.

–That said, initially I was surprised that the trade wasn’t something like Eller/Backes for Halak/2nd rounder. But like I mentioned earlier,  the goalie availability right now around the league probably would have made the addition of Backes unrealistic.

–Lars Eller, PK Subban and Carey Price. Not a bad young forward/defenseman/goalie combination. Habs fans shouldn’t be on suicide watch (at least not until next year depending on how Carey plays).

–I read about a Jason Spezza to the Oilers rumor. I think he’d be a nice fit in Edmonton but Ottawa would be crazy to deal another “star” for a mix of middle-of-the-pack NHLers. If they do, the Sens are like that bad fantasy GM who always trades his best player for depth. That guy never wins anything.

–Say what you want about Spezza’s contract or his defensive play but point-a-game players don’t grow on trees. If you trade him, then you’d better get something other than a couple of guys who max out at 50 points a year.

–I’m still highly curious about what Kaberle will fetch in a trade. I can’t believe some of the rumors (like Jeff Carter) are realistic. If Burke pulls that off then my jaw will hit the floor.

Mr. Smooth

–Dion Phaneuf came off as cool and confident during his captain speech as I did during an 8th grade dance. Only difference was that I couldn’t pounded the living s**t out of those that made fun of me.

–Kessel, Kadri, Dion, Schenn. Pretty good young core if they all play to their potential.  Certainly, the Leafs are much better off right now than when Brian took over.

–Early predictions for next year from yours truly:

Top 3 seeds  in the West: Blackhawks, Kings, Canucks

Top 3 seeds in the East: Capitals, Penguins, Bruins

Team to take the biggest fall in West: Coyotes

Team to take the biggest fall in East: Devils

Back to the playoffs in West: Blues

Back to the playoffs in East: Toronto? It’s hard to be confident about any of the 7 teams that didn’t make the post-season in the East, no?

I’ll do another one of these in September based on the movement in the next 3 months.

–Did any of you catch the NBA Finals? Pretty good series. I loved Ron Artest thanking his psychiatrist in the post-game interview. I really like the guy. Sure, he’s a little crazy but Ron comes off very genuine. I hated Rodman because he came off like a marketing gimmick. Ron just seems like a good guy.

–My World Cup team Argentina is 2-0 now with two impressive showings. My wife’s Brazil team looked shaky vs. North Korea but, sadly, still won. I haven’t watched every game (hard to wake up early for Honduras/Chilie), but the Spain-Switzerland game was probably my favorite one not involving Maradona’s squad.

–Even if you don’t like baseball, take the time to watch Stephen Strasburg pitch (he has a start tonight). It’s sick how well he can throw. Since words can’t do it justice, watch this (the break on the pitch at the 0:50 mark is insane):

[Edit: Looks like the YouTube video got deleted.]